A series for women concerned about safety. Men try to control women by offending them so they fight agains type casting. Seems odd but it works!
How Dangerous men control women #2
A series for women concerned about safety.
#2 Why men try to offend women. Typecasting
Typecasting is when a stranger tells you something negative about yourself in a charming way, so you are forced to negate the sentence and feel obliged to act a certain way. For example he might say with a smile: "you're probably too popular to talk to someone like me" - the reaction the stranger wants from the woman is "no, I'm not too popular" and she begins to talk to him. This man has just controlled the woman and has gained an entry into her world. Conversations have been started. She feels she’ll be rude to stop conversation and he has gotten just what he wanted.
Another example could be when the man says to a woman, again in a charming manner,… "you're just too proud to let someone help" - he expects her to fight that stereotype and agree to accept the strangers help. Once she’s accepted his help, again he has an entry into her world and possibly her apartment. Imagine a woman struggling with groceries and a man asks if he can help. The woman says “no” up front yet with charm the man then says “you are just too proud to ask for help”. The woman doesn’t like the stereotype and agrees to the mans help and he enters her apartment with the groceries… and assaults her (true story).
Be aware of this technique as its always manipulative. Again "why is this person trying to control me?”.
If you ever feel uncomfortable with a mans approach (this goes in social settings, business settings and sales solicitations), hold your hand up and simply say “please, I’m not interested". By being welcoming it raises his expectations of you, increases his investment, and gives him further insight into controlling you.
Bottom line: unless you are open eyed and interested in what a person has to offer, he is wasting your time or worse, you could be putting your life at risk.
This is #2 in a series of Five
How 'Dangerous Men control Women' series:
- Why charming men are dangerous to women. (charm)
- Why men try to offend women (type casting)
- Why men want to be on your team (forced teaming)
- Why bars are full of loan sharks. (loan shark)
- Why TMI can put you in danger. (tmi)
- Unsolicited Promise
- Discounting the word “no”